Shy guy

Written By All Video Subscribers on Saturday, February 4, 2012 | 12:34 PM

Shy guy
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I was just reading that shyness affects
something like 40 percent of the population.

I think that estimate is probably low.
Most everyone I know has a shy side,
except this one friend of mine,
which I think everyone who knows
him pretty much agrees is unfortunate.
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Shyness can be a tricky thing.
How many times have you thought someone
was reacting coolly toward you,
when they turned out to be just shy?
Conversely,
how many times have you thought
someone was reacting coolly toward you because
they were shy when, in fact, they thought you were an idiot? join BindasFriendz
Nowhere is one's struggle
with shyness any greater
than at a party where you don't know anyone.
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Shy people at parties
fall into three general categories:

Those
who try to blend in with the wallpaper.

Those
who spend the evening laughing at anything anyone says.

Those
who make the mistake of trying to break
the ice by enticing others to talk about
themselves and end up trapped in a marathon conversation
with the most boring person in the world.

I probably fall somewhere
in the middle on the shyness metre. join BindasFriendz
I am neither the life of the party
nor someone
who can identify everyone there by their shoes.

You could probably label me a shy egomaniac,
a description that fits a lot of newspaper people.
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My biggest problem at parties
is people
who excuse themselves right after you introduce yourself.
When I was single,
this used to happen a lot with women.
Often,
it would occur so quickly that
I wouldn't even get a chance to say,
''So, how do you like your eggs?'' join BindasFriendz
Another type
I often run into are the
''chopped livers''
-- people who all the time they are talking
to you are looking around for someone better to talk to.

Then there is the matter of eye contact.
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It's not that making eye contact is an especially big deal;
it's more that you don't always know how intent it should be,
or
when to break it off,
or
when you can take the stupid look off your face.
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What can be really disconcerting is
when you are engaged in eye contact with someone,
and you suddenly notice they have some kind
of major facial distraction going on -- like,
say, a growth or a crop of unruly nose hair
-- and you can't stop staring at it.

And then someone comes over,
and you hear yourself asking if they have met Mrs. Maya.

The best way for a shy person to get through a bad party?

Stake out a spot close to the bar,
and spend the evening conversing
with the martinis, olive.

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